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Note To @Zoeyjane: I’ve Finally Made It!

There is always much ado about Mommy Bloggers and their propensity to discuss the details of every bowel movement belonging to or coming out of their children.

As the mother of two teen boys, I have never dabbled in discussing the topic of poop because they were teens when I started blogging and…frankly, YUCK. Also, might I state the obvious by saying that not only do my boys never discuss their bathroom habits with me, but I don’t want to know AND wouldn’t share that with the internet public.

And then, the other day, I found out that by having teen boys who–probably–do poop (everyone does, you know) and are way too old for me to even consider discussing it here (and who would want me to???), well, I might be missing out on way more readers than I currently have. (Okay, I’m totally kidding. I can’t even type that with a straight face.)

A wise woman named Zoeyjane sent out a tweet which included the secret to being a success as a mommy blogger:

My response? Excuses, excuses.

Well, I am happy to report that I have something to report. And it’s a win-win for everyone involved. I’m going to mention poop, and that poop doesn’t belong to my own kids.

Here is an e-mail exchange that occurred yesterday between me, Kate, and her hubby. The baby (I’ve been calling him “Squeaks”), as of this afternoon, had not pooped in about 36 hours yet had sucked down about a million gallons of formula. We were all waiting for him to blow because, well, need I explain? Anyway, the e-mails:

Kate’s hubby (2:54 p.m.): Still no poop?

Me: (3:10 p.m.): We have poop. Squeaks’ butt finally exploded and filled an entire diaper. I waited a few minutes to make sure he was done…When I was cleaning him up he started going again so I had to stick another diaper on him until he was really done. 🙂

Kate: (3:44 p.m.): Bean once shot poop across the room.

Me (3:52 p.m.): GROSS. He came close; when I saw it coming out I grabbed that second diaper immediately. WHY AM I E-MAILING ABOUT POOP???????????????

So there you have it. I not only mentioned poop, but crafted a fine post around it that also did not embarrass my OWN kids one bit. I hope Google can handle all of the new subscribers that are rushing to add Suburban Scrawl to their readers!!!

©2010 Suburban Scrawl

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • WeaselMomma January 13, 2010, 12:07 pm

    I now want to know what google searches are bringing people to The Suburban Scrawl.

  • Clark Kent's Lunchbox January 13, 2010, 12:47 pm

    That's good poop. (That's what we used to say in the Army if someone would tell a good story or give good info on something.)

  • Sue January 13, 2010, 12:53 pm

    Um, you do realize that you have mentioned poop in 2 posts in a row. One was dog poop, but it's still poop. You are going to skyrocket into the mommy bloggers hall of fame!

  • Mama Smurf January 13, 2010, 12:54 pm

    You said poop…*giggles*

    hmmm I could write a post about how my dog had diarrhea and would put her but on the screen of the door wall and poo through the screen….or how she had diarrhea and would poo in the kitchen floor air vent….or how she now likes to bring in frozen poosicles into my home and knaws on them….

  • Kat January 13, 2010, 12:59 pm

    mmmmh poop…Let me know how the mentioning of poop on your blog is working out for ya. I got a few of those stories in the back of my hand as well…*cue evil laugh*

  • WILLIAM January 13, 2010, 1:08 pm

    You may think your teenage boys are in the bathroom pooping but they are not.

    CK LB brought me here. Not the poop post.

  • Melisa with one S January 13, 2010, 1:13 pm

    WM: I'll let you know! haha

    CK: Um, thanks. 🙂

    Sue: Wow, my readership is going to SOAR!!

    Mama Smurf: So gross. Especially the poopsicles!

    Kat: I'll let you know. It might be a gold mine for you too!

    William: Ick. A mom doesn't need to think about that!! (Thanks for visiting…??? haha)

  • LceeL January 13, 2010, 1:41 pm

    I always thought you were a big leaguer. You've obviously cranked it up a notch, though – reaching stratospheric heights. Well Done.

    Which reminds me … #2 Son has, I think, the largest colon in the world. He used to make curlycue … oh, nevermind.

  • Colleen - Mommy Always Wins January 13, 2010, 4:27 pm

    Huh. Maybe *I* need to talk about poop more often. Forget this pictures of cute kids thing…PSHAW!

  • Heather January 13, 2010, 10:38 pm

    Ewwww. I am thoroughly disgusted, especially after eating my lunch at work.

    ha ha ha ha.

  • Karen MEG January 13, 2010, 11:40 pm

    You give good poop ;)!

    Actually, I've posted about kids, baths, logging expeditions AND dog poops a couple of times, but maybe my timing was off, because I'm definitely not in any big leagues LOL!

  • Mags January 14, 2010, 1:36 am

    Oh boy…that's all I have to saw about that! LOL

  • CineClube January 14, 2010, 1:37 am

    lol 😀

  • Michelle January 14, 2010, 4:10 am

    Whoo hoo! Congrats, Melisa. I'll be waiting for the hordes to crash your site now. And you know… I don't know that *I've* ever done a post about poop. Ah-ha! That's my problem.

  • Melissa January 14, 2010, 7:55 pm

    I'm with WM do share what searches get people here…and Congrats on the poop scoop!

  • Otter Thomas January 14, 2010, 9:30 pm

    Yes even us dads talk about poop. Babies tend to make all our heads go a little haywire.